I just added a few little informational tidbits (Birthday, schools) to my dads wiki page. Here is the history.
I will do my major edit on this as well, where it will be drastically altered I am sure since he is, according to Fortune Magazine, Corporate Enemy #1.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
Wikipedia RULES! (I hate puns)
1. Keep the post and pictures on the topic.
2. Do not generalize, including groups of people unless it will benefit the article. If there is not facts or data to back a section up, then it doesn't belong in the article.
3. Cite sources within the text. If the article contains scientific facts, they should be cited within the text and not just listed at the end.
4. Keep it concise and check grammar. Don't get marked for cleanup like this article.
5. When using uncommon abbreviations: explain it first, then feel free to use it with occasional reminders. It can get very frustrating in a long article when you can't remember what repeated abbreviations stand for.
6. Do not use an ellipsis unless quoting information.
7. Keep language easy to understand. This article has a phrase that may leave a reader going, "huh?"
8. Sources that are personal opinions may not be reliable and should not be used. A blog is not a reliable source on current events or scientific facts.
9. Be objective. Don't be opinionated. Don't display a person bias.
10. Read what others have posted and don't repeat/ contradict (without facttual backing) other parts of the article.
2. Do not generalize, including groups of people unless it will benefit the article. If there is not facts or data to back a section up, then it doesn't belong in the article.
3. Cite sources within the text. If the article contains scientific facts, they should be cited within the text and not just listed at the end.
4. Keep it concise and check grammar. Don't get marked for cleanup like this article.
5. When using uncommon abbreviations: explain it first, then feel free to use it with occasional reminders. It can get very frustrating in a long article when you can't remember what repeated abbreviations stand for.
6. Do not use an ellipsis unless quoting information.
7. Keep language easy to understand. This article has a phrase that may leave a reader going, "huh?"
8. Sources that are personal opinions may not be reliable and should not be used. A blog is not a reliable source on current events or scientific facts.
9. Be objective. Don't be opinionated. Don't display a person bias.
10. Read what others have posted and don't repeat/ contradict (without facttual backing) other parts of the article.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Americans Hanging Over Balconies
The year was 1992. I looked like this:
My family and I had picked up and moved to Tokyo, Japan because of a job opportunity my dad had there. He is fluent in Japanese and his company at the time needed someone to start the Japanese branch. It was in Japan at the ripe young age of 5 that I learned there is at least one universal truth, and that is no matter where you are, people will be very confused and concerned if you hang your child over a 4th story balcony.
I have always been a dramatic chap. And there was never a more clear example of this then when my mom would try to make me do chores back in the land of the rising sun.
Mom: Brandon, I need you to empty all the garbages.
Five Year Old Brandon: No.
Mom: Brandon, do what I say.
Five year Old Brandon: No mom. I don't want to.
Mom: Alright, go to your room then.
Five Year Old Brandon: Nooooooooooooo!
Mom: *Picks up Five Year Old Brandon and takes him to his room*
Five Year Old Brandon: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE SO MEAN! I'M GOING TO FLING MYSELF OFF THE VALCONY!!!!
Its important to note 3 things here:
1- Thats a five year old kid threatening suicide.
2- The use of the word fling. I feel it adds a dramatic touch.
3- The use of the word valcony. I meant balcony and I feel this takes away some dramatic touch because you realize I'm a stupid little child.
This was a common episode. And it usually worked out for me. Until one day I made this threat with my dad present.
Dad: Do what your mother says.
Five Year Old Brandon: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE SO MEAN! I'M GOING TO FLING MYSELF OFF THE VALCONY!!!!
Dad: Ok. Do it.
Five Year Old Brandon: Huh?
Dad: Lets go. I'll help you.
Five Year Old Brandon: No...
Dad: Yes, lets go.
So off we went to the "valcony", my dad carrying me over his shoulder. We get there and he holds me over the rail by me feat and tells me to tell him when to let go. This is when my universal truth was learned.
Looking down 4 stories while screaming and crying, I looked into the eyes of true confusion and horror. Our Japanese neighbor who had purple hair and rose tinted sunglasses was out walking her pet monkey on the pathway I quite enjoyed playing on and didn't quite like as a place to die.
Looking up at the crazed American who was trying to kill his child, I saw a look that made sense to me. It was the look of "dude, thats messed up". As I screamed and screamed for my dad to not let me plunge to my death, a small crowd of worried Japanese folks gathered underneath in awe struck curiosity. They must of been thinking exactly what I now think of the whole situation. In no culture ever will this be looked upon as normal. But maybe it made me into the well rounded individual I am today.
My family and I had picked up and moved to Tokyo, Japan because of a job opportunity my dad had there. He is fluent in Japanese and his company at the time needed someone to start the Japanese branch. It was in Japan at the ripe young age of 5 that I learned there is at least one universal truth, and that is no matter where you are, people will be very confused and concerned if you hang your child over a 4th story balcony.
I have always been a dramatic chap. And there was never a more clear example of this then when my mom would try to make me do chores back in the land of the rising sun.
Mom: Brandon, I need you to empty all the garbages.
Five Year Old Brandon: No.
Mom: Brandon, do what I say.
Five year Old Brandon: No mom. I don't want to.
Mom: Alright, go to your room then.
Five Year Old Brandon: Nooooooooooooo!
Mom: *Picks up Five Year Old Brandon and takes him to his room*
Five Year Old Brandon: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE SO MEAN! I'M GOING TO FLING MYSELF OFF THE VALCONY!!!!
Its important to note 3 things here:
1- Thats a five year old kid threatening suicide.
2- The use of the word fling. I feel it adds a dramatic touch.
3- The use of the word valcony. I meant balcony and I feel this takes away some dramatic touch because you realize I'm a stupid little child.
This was a common episode. And it usually worked out for me. Until one day I made this threat with my dad present.
Dad: Do what your mother says.
Five Year Old Brandon: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE SO MEAN! I'M GOING TO FLING MYSELF OFF THE VALCONY!!!!
Dad: Ok. Do it.
Five Year Old Brandon: Huh?
Dad: Lets go. I'll help you.
Five Year Old Brandon: No...
Dad: Yes, lets go.
So off we went to the "valcony", my dad carrying me over his shoulder. We get there and he holds me over the rail by me feat and tells me to tell him when to let go. This is when my universal truth was learned.
Looking down 4 stories while screaming and crying, I looked into the eyes of true confusion and horror. Our Japanese neighbor who had purple hair and rose tinted sunglasses was out walking her pet monkey on the pathway I quite enjoyed playing on and didn't quite like as a place to die.
Looking up at the crazed American who was trying to kill his child, I saw a look that made sense to me. It was the look of "dude, thats messed up". As I screamed and screamed for my dad to not let me plunge to my death, a small crowd of worried Japanese folks gathered underneath in awe struck curiosity. They must of been thinking exactly what I now think of the whole situation. In no culture ever will this be looked upon as normal. But maybe it made me into the well rounded individual I am today.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
A facebook chat with an eventual girlfriend.
To give a bit of background, this conversation happened a few days after we met in person when my band played on a TV show and she was in the studio audience. A few days later I sent her a flyer to our next show on myspace and she said something along the lines of "I dare you to send me a flyer again". I went on to flood her page with flyers. And then...
Brandon McBride
12:36am Nov 14th
Check your myspace.
(And read the whole thing)
Amy Briggs
12:11pm Nov 14th
Report Message
ahahahaha, thats great! very impressive. You definitely stand up to a dare... i will remember that.
i love muffin tops. you should eat some right now because i am
Brandon McBride
12:49pm Nov 14th
Sometimes I wish you wouldnt make me feel sad about how I dont have muffin tops.
Amy Briggs
1:03pm Nov 14th
Report Message
awwww, now that makes me sad that i made you sad. you can have some of mine?
Amy Briggs
1:04pm Nov 14th
Report Message
psssst. i put pictures of KT (Kid Theodore, my band) up from 15 minutes (The TV show we played on).
Brandon McBride
1:10pm Nov 14th
Can I? Oh good. Just send them UPS overnight.
So I hear. The word on facebook is I've been tagged. Which makes me it. Which sucks. Cause tag bags are frowned upon.
Where do you work?
Amy Briggs
1:13pm Nov 14th
Report Message
tag bags... ha ha.
i work at PGM Inc. it a phone survey place. it's lame-o but i actually like it a lot there. i have worked there so long that they love me and i would have to try really hard to get fired. i can do anythng there haha. but yeah, i just barely realized i dont even have to work on friday when you guys play so i dont need to worry about the time.
where do you work?
Brandon McBride
1:17pm Nov 14th
Tag bags. Its like a tag back but instead of tagging someone, you smack em with a bag of fruits or potatoes (depending on the season). That or I cant spell.
What do you do then? What exactly gets surveyed? Why did you lie to me earlier about you working friday?
I start working at Barnes and Noble on Thursday. Ive been usless and unemployed for a bit now. Sad really.
Amy Briggs
1:22pm Nov 14th
Report Message
barnes and noble eh? that seems like it would be a cool job. i love books.
right now i'm doing a customer satisfaction survey for a home warranty company. its pretty easy. i didn't lie! i thought i had to.... but i dont, YAY
being unemployed is the best, except for the lack of money. thats terrible.
do you have any messenger of sorts? msn? aim?
Brandon McBride
1:34pm Nov 14th
Im hoping it will be. I hate retail. But maybe itll be ok selling something I like. And the discount is good. And i hate real jobs in general so its ok I spose.
Do you get people yelling at you for calling them? Whats the meanest thing a person has done?
I had msn long ago. Then i retired it. Turned to the dark side of text messaging. hehe. Which can be done by texting "Knitted Hats" to 801-898-9045.
Amy Briggs
1:42pm Nov 14th
Report Message
people do get mad. they think we are selling something or they are busy and just dont want to talk. i had one guy yell an extremely long line of swear words at me for trying to do a survey with his grandma once. its usually not bad. it just sucks they insult you personally haha
Brandon McBride
1:56pm Nov 14th
I worked for Direct TVs call center before tour but quit before we actually started making calls so i didnt get to deal with mean people.
Guess the moral of your storie is to not talk to peoples grandmoms.
At this point I assume we went on to text messages. In case you are curious, we went on to date for 7 months or so and then she got engaged a month after we broke up. The end.
Brandon McBride
12:36am Nov 14th
Check your myspace.
(And read the whole thing)
Amy Briggs
12:11pm Nov 14th
Report Message
ahahahaha, thats great! very impressive. You definitely stand up to a dare... i will remember that.
i love muffin tops. you should eat some right now because i am
Brandon McBride
12:49pm Nov 14th
Sometimes I wish you wouldnt make me feel sad about how I dont have muffin tops.
Amy Briggs
1:03pm Nov 14th
Report Message
awwww, now that makes me sad that i made you sad. you can have some of mine?
Amy Briggs
1:04pm Nov 14th
Report Message
psssst. i put pictures of KT (Kid Theodore, my band) up from 15 minutes (The TV show we played on).
Brandon McBride
1:10pm Nov 14th
Can I? Oh good. Just send them UPS overnight.
So I hear. The word on facebook is I've been tagged. Which makes me it. Which sucks. Cause tag bags are frowned upon.
Where do you work?
Amy Briggs
1:13pm Nov 14th
Report Message
tag bags... ha ha.
i work at PGM Inc. it a phone survey place. it's lame-o but i actually like it a lot there. i have worked there so long that they love me and i would have to try really hard to get fired. i can do anythng there haha. but yeah, i just barely realized i dont even have to work on friday when you guys play so i dont need to worry about the time.
where do you work?
Brandon McBride
1:17pm Nov 14th
Tag bags. Its like a tag back but instead of tagging someone, you smack em with a bag of fruits or potatoes (depending on the season). That or I cant spell.
What do you do then? What exactly gets surveyed? Why did you lie to me earlier about you working friday?
I start working at Barnes and Noble on Thursday. Ive been usless and unemployed for a bit now. Sad really.
Amy Briggs
1:22pm Nov 14th
Report Message
barnes and noble eh? that seems like it would be a cool job. i love books.
right now i'm doing a customer satisfaction survey for a home warranty company. its pretty easy. i didn't lie! i thought i had to.... but i dont, YAY
being unemployed is the best, except for the lack of money. thats terrible.
do you have any messenger of sorts? msn? aim?
Brandon McBride
1:34pm Nov 14th
Im hoping it will be. I hate retail. But maybe itll be ok selling something I like. And the discount is good. And i hate real jobs in general so its ok I spose.
Do you get people yelling at you for calling them? Whats the meanest thing a person has done?
I had msn long ago. Then i retired it. Turned to the dark side of text messaging. hehe. Which can be done by texting "Knitted Hats" to 801-898-9045.
Amy Briggs
1:42pm Nov 14th
Report Message
people do get mad. they think we are selling something or they are busy and just dont want to talk. i had one guy yell an extremely long line of swear words at me for trying to do a survey with his grandma once. its usually not bad. it just sucks they insult you personally haha
Brandon McBride
1:56pm Nov 14th
I worked for Direct TVs call center before tour but quit before we actually started making calls so i didnt get to deal with mean people.
Guess the moral of your storie is to not talk to peoples grandmoms.
At this point I assume we went on to text messages. In case you are curious, we went on to date for 7 months or so and then she got engaged a month after we broke up. The end.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
The Arcade Fire STILL can't dance.
September 26, 2007 the band Arcade Fire was set to play in Lehi, Utah. This date coincided with a low point in my financial history. I quite literally had less then $20 to my name. The going rate for tickets to the show was just over $40. Seeing as how the Arcade Fire are one of the best bands in the world right now, particularly when it comes to live shows, I decided I would go to the outdoor venue and listen from outside the gates.
I got to the venue and took a walk around. When I got to the side of the venue that was across from the parking lot, I saw several large buses next to a building and figured that this was the bands back stage area. I went into the building and saw one member of the band chatting with someone involved with the tour next to big table of finger foods. Now having figured out where the band was, I decided to try my hand at being a member of their entourage. I headed towards a road that lead to the back of the stage and a security guard stopped me and asked for my badge. I told him I left it in the building and could go get it if he would like. He asked me too and I said I would, but I first wanted to ask him about some things. He said alright and I spent the next 20 minutes acting like I had never been to Utah. I asked him about Thanksgiving Point (the venue we were at), Mormons, skiing, and all the other things people ask me when I tell them I am from Utah. I told him I was with the opening act, LCD Sound System, and when they finished I told him I was going to go see them off stage. He said alright and I went on my way. I had now gone from not being able to get in to the show to getting backstage for free.
Once backstage I only had one more security gaurd question me. I happened to catch the name of the head of security (Austin) during my talks with the other gaurd and said that he had OKed my being back there. I went out front and watched most the show from the front row. The show was incredible and I watched the encore from the wings of the stage. When the band left the stage, I shook each of their hands as they went back too the busses.
After the show I made my way back to the building I had found earlier, and after about an hour of the band meeting and greeting long lost family, radio contest winners, and other completely uninteresting people, everyone filtered out except me, a couple friends I snuck back, and the two bands. We proceeded to have a dance party to LCD Sound System's new album that hadn't been heard yet by anyone outside of the bands inner circle. The guitarist of LCD and I had a dance off while the Arcade Fire drummer sat in the corner taking pictures. None of the Arcade Fire crew had what you would call "good" dancing ability (skinny tall redhead doing the robot anyone?) but they were all sorts of fun to hang out with. They were also kind enough to give us all the food that was left from the meet and greet. A couple hours later, we said our goodbyes and headed to our cars.
Once in the car, still beaming with the joy of hanging out with one of my favorite bands, me and my brother headed home. We got about a mile down the road and got pulled over for having a "red flagged" license plate. I had some unpaid tickets that had turned into a warrant so I was put in the back of a police car and carted off to prison where I spent the next 20 hours. The first 2 hours were spent trying to get ahold of my brother to bail me out but the phones in jail cant dial to cell phones. I was forced to call my step mom at 3 AM and she informed me I would be staying the night in jail. After that chat I got put in a solitary holding cell for 3 hours without any blankets or pillows or anything resembeling comfort. Just a toilet, a sink, and a concret bench. Finally they took me over to wear all the other hooligans were staying and as look would have it, I got the top bunk. Below me was a doctor who was put away for filling out perscriptions for himself.
To summarize my night, within about 3 hours I had seen one of the best shows of my life, met some of my musical heroes, danced with said heroes, and been booked in the Utah County jail. Life can get pretty intresting when you only have $20.
I got to the venue and took a walk around. When I got to the side of the venue that was across from the parking lot, I saw several large buses next to a building and figured that this was the bands back stage area. I went into the building and saw one member of the band chatting with someone involved with the tour next to big table of finger foods. Now having figured out where the band was, I decided to try my hand at being a member of their entourage. I headed towards a road that lead to the back of the stage and a security guard stopped me and asked for my badge. I told him I left it in the building and could go get it if he would like. He asked me too and I said I would, but I first wanted to ask him about some things. He said alright and I spent the next 20 minutes acting like I had never been to Utah. I asked him about Thanksgiving Point (the venue we were at), Mormons, skiing, and all the other things people ask me when I tell them I am from Utah. I told him I was with the opening act, LCD Sound System, and when they finished I told him I was going to go see them off stage. He said alright and I went on my way. I had now gone from not being able to get in to the show to getting backstage for free.
Once backstage I only had one more security gaurd question me. I happened to catch the name of the head of security (Austin) during my talks with the other gaurd and said that he had OKed my being back there. I went out front and watched most the show from the front row. The show was incredible and I watched the encore from the wings of the stage. When the band left the stage, I shook each of their hands as they went back too the busses.
After the show I made my way back to the building I had found earlier, and after about an hour of the band meeting and greeting long lost family, radio contest winners, and other completely uninteresting people, everyone filtered out except me, a couple friends I snuck back, and the two bands. We proceeded to have a dance party to LCD Sound System's new album that hadn't been heard yet by anyone outside of the bands inner circle. The guitarist of LCD and I had a dance off while the Arcade Fire drummer sat in the corner taking pictures. None of the Arcade Fire crew had what you would call "good" dancing ability (skinny tall redhead doing the robot anyone?) but they were all sorts of fun to hang out with. They were also kind enough to give us all the food that was left from the meet and greet. A couple hours later, we said our goodbyes and headed to our cars.
Once in the car, still beaming with the joy of hanging out with one of my favorite bands, me and my brother headed home. We got about a mile down the road and got pulled over for having a "red flagged" license plate. I had some unpaid tickets that had turned into a warrant so I was put in the back of a police car and carted off to prison where I spent the next 20 hours. The first 2 hours were spent trying to get ahold of my brother to bail me out but the phones in jail cant dial to cell phones. I was forced to call my step mom at 3 AM and she informed me I would be staying the night in jail. After that chat I got put in a solitary holding cell for 3 hours without any blankets or pillows or anything resembeling comfort. Just a toilet, a sink, and a concret bench. Finally they took me over to wear all the other hooligans were staying and as look would have it, I got the top bunk. Below me was a doctor who was put away for filling out perscriptions for himself.
To summarize my night, within about 3 hours I had seen one of the best shows of my life, met some of my musical heroes, danced with said heroes, and been booked in the Utah County jail. Life can get pretty intresting when you only have $20.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Arcade Fire Can't Dance (Thoughts From a Jail Cell)
September 26, 2007 the band Arcade Fire was set to play in Lehi, Utah. This date coincided with a low point in my financial history. I quite literally had less then $20 to my name. The going rate for tickets to the show was just over $40. Seeing as how the Arcade Fire are one of the best bands in the world right now, particularly when it comes to live shows, I decided I would go to the outdoor venue and listen from outside the gates.
I got to the venue and took a walk around. When I got to the side of the venue that was across from the parking lot, I saw several large buses next to a building and figured that this was the bands back stage area. I went into the building and saw one member of the band chatting with someone involved with the tour next to big table of finger foods. Now having figured out where the band was, I decided to try my hand at being a member of their entourage. I headed towards a road that lead to the back of the stage and a security guard stopped me and asked for my badge. I told him I left it in the building and could go get it if he would like. He asked me too and I said I would, but I first wanted to ask him about some things. He said alright and I spent the next 20 minutes acting like I had never been to Utah. I asked him about Thanksgiving Point (the venue we were at), Mormons, skiing, and all the other things people ask me when I tell them I am from Utah. I told him I was with the opening act, LCD Sound System, and when they finished I told him I was going to go see them off stage. He said alright and I went on my way. I had now gone from not being able to get in to the show to getting backstage for free.
I went out front and watched most the show from the front row. The show was great and I watched the encore from the wings of the stage. After the show I made my way back to the building I had found earlier, and after about an hour of the band meeting and greeting long lost family, radio contest winners, and other completely uninteresting people, everyone filtered out except me, a couple friends I snuck back, and the two bands. We proceeded to have a dance party to LCD Sound System's new album that hadn't been heard yet by anyone outside of the bands inner circle. A couple hours later, we said our goodbyes and headed to our cars.
Once in the car, still beaming with the joy of hanging out with one of my favorite bands, me and my brother headed home. We got about a mile down the road and got pulled over for having a "red flagged" license plate. I had some unpaid tickets that had turned into a warrant so I was put in the back of a police car and carted off to prison where I spent the next 20 hours.
To summarize my nigh, within about 3 hours I had seen one of the best shows of my life, met some of my musical heroes, danced with said heroes, and been booked in the Utah County jail. Life can get pretty intresting when you only have $20.
I got to the venue and took a walk around. When I got to the side of the venue that was across from the parking lot, I saw several large buses next to a building and figured that this was the bands back stage area. I went into the building and saw one member of the band chatting with someone involved with the tour next to big table of finger foods. Now having figured out where the band was, I decided to try my hand at being a member of their entourage. I headed towards a road that lead to the back of the stage and a security guard stopped me and asked for my badge. I told him I left it in the building and could go get it if he would like. He asked me too and I said I would, but I first wanted to ask him about some things. He said alright and I spent the next 20 minutes acting like I had never been to Utah. I asked him about Thanksgiving Point (the venue we were at), Mormons, skiing, and all the other things people ask me when I tell them I am from Utah. I told him I was with the opening act, LCD Sound System, and when they finished I told him I was going to go see them off stage. He said alright and I went on my way. I had now gone from not being able to get in to the show to getting backstage for free.
I went out front and watched most the show from the front row. The show was great and I watched the encore from the wings of the stage. After the show I made my way back to the building I had found earlier, and after about an hour of the band meeting and greeting long lost family, radio contest winners, and other completely uninteresting people, everyone filtered out except me, a couple friends I snuck back, and the two bands. We proceeded to have a dance party to LCD Sound System's new album that hadn't been heard yet by anyone outside of the bands inner circle. A couple hours later, we said our goodbyes and headed to our cars.
Once in the car, still beaming with the joy of hanging out with one of my favorite bands, me and my brother headed home. We got about a mile down the road and got pulled over for having a "red flagged" license plate. I had some unpaid tickets that had turned into a warrant so I was put in the back of a police car and carted off to prison where I spent the next 20 hours.
To summarize my nigh, within about 3 hours I had seen one of the best shows of my life, met some of my musical heroes, danced with said heroes, and been booked in the Utah County jail. Life can get pretty intresting when you only have $20.
Monday, January 14, 2008
2008 seems like a real prick.
My name is Brandon and I am in the band Kid Theodore. We play about around Utah and tour a bit in the west. We had Robert Redford shut down one of our shows the other day. Butch Cassidy was always he brains anyhow.
Im a Political Science major and if the music thing doenst go through I would like to get into journalism. Politics, music, sports, all of it. My favorite authors are Douglas Adams and Hunter S. Thomson. Favorite bands are Radiohead and The Beatles (and a few thousand more but thsoe two usually top the list).
Ill try to not be to vulgar on this blog. But I make no promises. Expecially if the god damned New England Patriots win the Super Bowl.
Cheers.
Im a Political Science major and if the music thing doenst go through I would like to get into journalism. Politics, music, sports, all of it. My favorite authors are Douglas Adams and Hunter S. Thomson. Favorite bands are Radiohead and The Beatles (and a few thousand more but thsoe two usually top the list).
Ill try to not be to vulgar on this blog. But I make no promises. Expecially if the god damned New England Patriots win the Super Bowl.
Cheers.
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